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OnSmash big bossman Hof must have a heart of gold. Or maybe just a soft spot for niggas from Queens. First he’s got Consequence advising you misguided mic spitters, and now the return of YN. YN is back?!!! Wow, you rap geeks don’t really deserve to start the week off so lovely.
Anyways, I’m not really here to lend a helping hand other than to entertain you. Tonight, the late great mag kingpin cops a squat on top of your TV set. ego trip’s Miss Rap Supreme. 10pm. Vh1. That’s: ego trip’s Miss Rap Supreme. 10pm. Vh1. You know all about it, c’mon honey don’t front. Y’all know I’m all about the numbers and high opening night ratings will keep the dimpled smile on Berta’s baby boy’s grillpiece.
To ensure my success, I’m gonna invade this space every Monday for the next eight weeks. That’s how long the show will be on the air. See, it’s simple mathematics. Anyway, to get you into the female rap spirit, I will present one of my favorite videos from one of hip-hop’s incredible queen pens. (I promise no Queen Pen. I do have taste you know.) I’m also on some director’s cut shit, gonna share with you young whippersnappers my insights and thoughts from the visual masterwork.
So without further adieu or Erykah Badu, I present MC Lyte’s “Paper Thin.”
Not only is this song great but also so is the video. Watch it yourself, digest and then watch it again with my essential guide to the things that you are witnessing.
:00-:25 First of all this might be the greatest opener to any video ever made (Eat your heart out Kanye!). Two matching Jettas (drug dealer car of choice back in my high school days) skid suddenly in the front of the Union Square train station in NYC. And then the gripping dialogue: “The subway? You got this bad Jetta here and you wanna take the subway!”
:39 DJ K-Rock plays train conductor. And do you notice Lyte’s female bodyguard. I think she went by Ket or Kat. She looks like she’d kick Chyna’s ass.
:44 Gotta love the fake cheesy newspaper headline: MC Lyte Rocks The Nation! That marketing plan was Nat’s!
:51 Uh oh, bodyguard busts dude out. Lyte’s premonition is correct! Her man is getting his Jack Tripper on right on the iron horse. Sorry ladies, he’s a cheater. Hell hath no fury!
1:00 Ah shit, we’re in color again. Got a lil mo’ money in the video budget than we thought.
1:04 Love the Lyte album art as ad in the back of the car. Again, you’re a great man, Nat Robinson.
1:09 Here’s a lil racism: A fake Taimak-looking light-skinned brotha eating Chinese takeout with some chopsticks. And a doctor??? Might not have wanted to get so literal on that part of the song.
1:20 That’s right, skeezers. Lyte’s here, you better break north!
1:24 Didn’t see Lyte’s judo chop coming, did ya? Don’t get distracted by them doorknockers, knocka.
1:27 Who says ole girl can’t dance? Step in the name of singleness.
1:30 I always wanted but never had a big-ass boom box.
1:36 Pick pocketing on NY subways is so old school.
1:41 Yes that was ego trip’s Miss Rap Supreme host MC Serch. Went by fast but you’ll see him again.
1:46 Mo’ political incorrectness: A blind man with an MC Lyte sign on his chest. Shame on you nuhs!
1:52 Lyte’s headphones are crazy big. She’s a ball of energy. Is this her first video?
1:58 Yup, that’s Jazzy Joyce in the middle. Where she at? In the middle!
1:59 Are we clowning the homeless now? Is anyone safe?
2:12 Don’t hit him Lyte! Let your bodyguard toss the chump on the platform.
2:15 That didn’t look like a scarf around his neck.
2:19 I see you Serch. And no that’s not why I picked this video. What kinda selfish self-promoter do you think I am? (Insert sinister laugh)
2:21 Hey what’s the pickpocket vick doin’ waving his arm in the air? Doesn’t he know he got robbed?
2:23 Who’s Lyte pointing at if duke is already off the train? Taimak?
2:26 Under that Nike hat is BDP’s D-Nice. I heard rumors that him and Lyte were real snuggle bunnies but I ain’t one to gossip.
2:43 A black man in a cage? Incarcerated in the court of the transit authority? Ha!
2:50 That leather jacket Lyte got is kinda hot.
2:57 You know the Audio Two had to get their cameo on.
3:00 Just in case, you missed that album art ad.
3:08 Was the K-Rock in the baby blue sweatpants booty shot really necessary?
3:16 Lyte will never forgive you!
3:20 The bodyguard’s First Priority jacket got me fiendin’ for one.
3:23 Wait, the fake Andre Harrell who got juxed is asleep and awaken again. Fire the director!
3:34 Ah, Lyte got a new boo. And all true man. Word to Alexander O’Neal and his sweaty forehead.
3:38 Can’t leave without giving the drummer some!
Sidebar:
Just like I promised you at Unkut.
If you’re looking for YN and miss him so much that you need to stay in touch—get your Stan on and social network with him at the following spots below. As my fellow legendary, now-you-see-him-now-you-don’t cat Cameron Giles would say, “I’ll holla!”
facebook.com/people/Elliott_Wilson/541215670
myspace.com/makavelliott
Peace to the homies: Plain Pat, Timmhotep and Young Legend.